Understanding how values can provide the guardrails to your life
Blog #2 - February 21, 2022
What are your values?
How can you live according to your values?
These are questions that I ask my clients upon initially meeting them, as well as continuously throughout our time together.
What are values? To summarize, values are personal qualities that we hold in utmost regard. Values provide ones life a sense of direction. Values help us to know if we are on course, or if we have ventured off the ideal route. Values help us to become the best versions of ourselves. Values can be reflected upon in times of uncertainty, challenge, or struggle, as well as a goal to prioritize each day. For example, humility, effort, leadership, honesty, courage, accountability, communication, confidence, collaboration, learning, growth, family, gratitude, mindfulness, and resilience are among countless potential values. The figure below outlines several other values that individuals may hold dear.
Now, it’s great to know what values are, but how can we determine our values? This can be the tricky part. Let’s say out of the above list, I identify 10 values that I deem essential to create my best self. In times of uncertainty or conflict, I reflect on these 10 values. But wait … I forget 3 of these original 10 values! Out of the remaining 7, I don’t know which value(s) I want to apply to my current predicament. That’s the issue with having too many values. It can be difficult to know which values exactly help provide your life direction. That’s why it’s important to know your core values. Core values consist of a limited number of values (between 1-3) that tells you exactly who you want to be. It’s a difficult process to cut a larger list of values into your core list to provide your life structure. However, this is what we need to do if we want to live according to our values. The more condensed we can make our list, the more clarity you will have surrounding your values.
How can you live according to your values?
There is an activity that I like to do with my clients that helps them identify their values. I am going to share it with you today.
First, I want you to pull out a piece of paper. On this piece of paper, I want you to identify 10 values that are important to you and/or regularly guide your actions. These values can come from the list I provided above, or can be ones that you come up with on your own.
Next, I want you to come up with your 3 core values. These core values are ones that stand out most to you out of your original list. It can be difficult to narrow that list down, but spend some time coming up with 3 that are most important and meaningful. Once these three core values are discovered, I would like you to define what these values mean to you, and why you decided to prioritize them.
Once finished, I want you to describe 3-5 behaviours you perform on a daily basis that incorporate and align with each of your core values.
Finally, I want you to complete the following sentences:
Today, I will prioritize (insert value) by performing the following behaviours:
a.
b.
c.
I’m currently struggling with (describe struggle/challenge). (Insert value) will help me because (insert how value will assist). To do so, I will prioritize this value by performing the following actions:
a.
b.
c.
Values are an important element to help steady the ship amidst choppy waters. Remember to check in on your values regularly to determine if you are living according to your best self. Repeating this exercise, or through simple daily reflection, can enable you to determine if the life you are living is aligned with your values.
I conceptualize values like guardrails on the road. If we as people are the vehicle, values are like the guardrails on the road. They help us to stay on course.
Thank you for reading. I hope you all find a way to live according your values, especially during times of uncertainty or challenge.